Weekend Thoughts

I think I have made up my mind about the Republican ticket. John McCain lost his ability to think independently and has chosen give in to the right wing party line. Basically, he has sold his soul for a chance at the presidency. John Stewart said it right. The Maverick for Reform in 2000 has become the Reformed Maverick 2008. Sarah Palin is anti-intellectual, unqualified and as phony as a 3 dollar bill. What say you that John McCain, if elected president, finds himself dying mysteriously in office and is replaced with this easy to control, out of her depth puppet? Then the end times can really begin...

Obama and Biden need to get their game on now.

I wonder if evangelicals realize that the more they drag religion into politics, the more people are turned off to God in droves. Souls are lost to Jesus every day because being a believer is associated with being a self righteous, narrow-minded non-thinker with a stick up your ass. Who wants a piece of that?

Second Impression--Sarah Palin

I was trying to listen to her all-important acceptance speech on NPR as I was driving home, but her speaking style aurally is like listening to a cheesy spokesperson on a local carpet ad. She basically repeated what she said in her introductory speech, went on and on about her family, tweaked the dems with the same old party line blather, so I couldn't gleen any new substance from it. I got frustrated. I wanted her to go in for some more coaching, and a good rewrite, this time with substance over form, and get rid of the faux-sincerity! It's so faux!

Perhaps she said something important and noteworthy when I switched away for the traffic report for a minute. The audience at the convention sounded over-excited, like they were being forced to cheer next to the radio pavilion. What did it look like? I will be interested in seeing the full speech on video to see if communication was more effective visually. A transcript might be nice too, in case I can't sit through it.

Believe it or not, I really would like to like her even if I do not like her reputation as an extreme right winger and her apparent overall lack of experience. I actually think John McCain is personally a pretty okay guy and the best thing Republicans have let rise to the top in some time. But I am still scratching my head on this veep pick...I don't get her supposed appeal, and this speech as far as I could listen to it did not answer any questions whatsoever, just repeat stuff over and over as if it was an answer.

The "news" channels and all are no help. I know more about poor daughter Bristol than I do about Sarah. How incredibly inept. The manipulation by the GOP and the Dems in this "family" situation is ham-handed and highly irritating. Using the children while thumping their chests at the injustice of their exposure. My inner teen girl is highly mortified for Bristol. Poor kid.

I guess I will just have to keep wading through the muck, waiting for the real Sarah Palin to emerge from the media underbrush, fierce and proud or loud and stinky, just like the moose she likes to hunt.

First impression--Sarah Palin

She is going to get eaten alive, that is my first impression...

When I listened to new GOP Vice Presidential contender, Sarah Palin, make her acceptance speech, I heard her less-than-exciting speaking style, and her words and listed credentials and thought, "I feel so like I am being patronized by Republicans trotting out the anti-Hillary!"

Then I decided that may be kind of knee jerk response, I should research her and give her a chance.

So I did that. It is all rather interesting.

I'm not sure what I think of her personally--I really don't know her yet. She seems nice enough as a person. Even if someone is not liberal leaning like me, they can be a good, stand-up person to admire. Mostly, I get the impression she is not fully formed as a political entity. I wonder if she will get a chance--this may be a debacle. Again, this is my first impression.

Right now I say her lack of national or international experience is scary to me. I would liken it to being a freshman class president of a small rural high school, and suddenly being promoted to superintendent of the the largest school system in the country. She just doesn't have the experience to know what is going on, and the learning curve will be ridiculous. At best, she is being set up to fail. It makes her in danger of being even easier to control by a hawkish cabinet than George W., which may be just what the powers that be are after. A year and a few months of being governor in a small (in population) state and a mayor and city council member of a small town before that...that isn't enough. It makes Obama look grandly experienced.

She and I do not see eye to eye on basic issues. Her credentials list that she is anti-abortion even in case of rape or incest, an NRA member (but is a hunter, not a gun nut), she is all for drilling in Alaska, is against protection for polar bears, and does not think global warming is a man made crisis. She is a proponent of creationism being taught in schools. A neocon's dream.

Actually, overall she out of touch with anything that I would consider remotely presidential material. And we have to think that way--presidential-- McCain's age and the world political climate make the presidency a chancy business. Whoever takes this position has to be more prepared to step into the presidency than anyone ever before, not just the usual funerals and light duties.

I'll be interested in seeing if she may have potential later in the political arena, or if this sudden immersion in the national spotlight will doom her. Politically, I wonder if the Republicans thought this through or are just throwing something out there out of desperation and hoping that it sticks. Look, it's young! It's white but it isn't a man and she's purty! We have DIVERSITY! (There are other more experienced women in the Republican party to choose from...aren't there? Please name me one? I don't care if she isn't pretty...)

I wonder if the neocons of the Republican party are hoping for a pretty and pliable doll to trot out and pretend that they care about the "Hillary women" (though how she could appeal to them, I don't know since she seems okay with the current party platform that is designed to continue to try to take women's reproductive rights away, block legislation for equal pay for equal work, and make it hard for working class people to make a living, afford healthcare and also pay for decent child care.)

And let's be real--just because she didn't go ahead with the Alaska "Bridge to Nowhere" doesn't make her a maverick, either--just sensible, especially since her state still got to keep the money earmarked for it for other uses, from what I understand.

Did McCain really think this out? Are they counting on women who are Independents to bring out the "It's got a Vagina!" vote? Do the Republicans really think women are that stupid?

And I wonder...if she does end up getting the job, will neocons connive make sure she is paid less for it than a man? And will McCain suggest she gets more education and job training to equalize that?

Middle School...Like, OMG

My oldest son now at his first day of middle school. He got on the bus at an ungodly early hour for a growing adolescent, going to school even though he has a bad cold. He did not want to miss the first day, because that is when they tell you everything--like where is your locker, who your teachers are, what do you need to bring to class with you, etc. The change is stressful enough, no need to fall behind if you are still ambulatory.

Watching him get on the bus, I felt my own anxiety, remembering how middle school was 2 of the toughest years of my education, mostly because of my peers. I am hoping that he will make friends and keep the ones he has, and not be singled out as prey by that inevitable group that makes life hell for everyone else. If they try him out, I hope that he will stand up for himself, and his friends stand with him.

Schools try harder to stop bullying than they did when I was in school, but you cannot underestimate the wiles of the adolescent mind. They have a lot more tools to work with too, like the internet and texting, camera phones, video phones, etc.

From an informal poll of my friends, 100% remembered getting bullied by someone in middle school. All of us can also remember some kid who was the focus of most of the intense bullying, who had no one to stand up for him (often because we were scared the focus would then come to us), whose life was scarred forever because he didn't know how to stand up for himself. In my middle school years, the poor kid's name was Pete. He was a nice boy, but he did not stand up for himself, and the lowlife druggie kids would gang up on him. I don't think he graduated with us. I will always feel I failed him, because maybe all it would have taken was rallying the other kids in the class to stand up and tell the low life kids none of us were going to take it from them anymore. There were so many more of us than there were of them. We talked amongst ourselves about how horrible it was, but we were too chicken to take a stand against them.

My personal bullies were a couple of girls, Jill and Stella, who made teasing me a personal challenge in 7th grade. I was miserable. Then sometime between 7th and 8th grade, I had spent a lot of time with some older friends and realized that I could take Jill and Stella's power away from them by 1) not acknowledging their teasing, 2) pretending they were by best friends and being super friendly to them. They walked into my Spanish II class and grinned evilly to each other, but the grins faded to confusion when I greeted them with great excitement and enthusiasm. I totally ignored when they tried some stuff that used to agitate me, and they were flummoxed. I was no fun anymore. They stopped bullying me immediately. Later, when we were in college, Stella apologized to me, and expressed she felt great shame that she ever acted like that, even 6 years later. Stella, I knew, had her own bullies to deal with, and thank goodness, most of us outgrow middle school. I forgave her long before she forgave herself!

Eighth grade was hard because I tried out a few new personalities that were not me, and highly annoying to others, apparently. I lost a few friends with that phase. A small group of girls singled me out for teasing because I had breasts and they did not. They spread the rumor that I stuffed my bra. I protested, but I was not about to expose myself even in the girls locker room to prove it false, because then they would spread the rumor I was gay. I had a boy ask me to "go with" him, and I was so excited! Finally a boy was paying attention to me! We held hands once in the hallway, and we got a lot of attention. Mean girl attention. That made me so nervous, and I avoided him and even hid from him for 3 weeks until he cornered me and said we should break up.

The next adolescent relationship was with a boy who professed his crush on me and then within weeks moved to New Hampshire. We carried on a pen pal relationship for many years, and it was easy to remain 100% faithful, because really, I was not ready for anything else. I highly recommend pen pal relationships during early high school. They allow for introspection, communication, and no physical involvement to screw up your life or health.

Yes, as I watch my son go off to middle school, I know he will have probably just as miserable of a time as everyone else. He will make his own mistakes, change his own behavior, and learn to deal with difficult people. He will be confused by girls. He will worry about his peers. But in the end, hopefully, he will come out whole and enjoy his high school years having already gone through the hard part.

Go Masters Women Athletes!

Of all the Olympic athletes who are competing in the Olympics, I am proudest of Dara Torres, 41, Oksana Chusovitina, 33, and Constantina Tomescu-Dita, 38.

Torres still got the second fastest world time ever and came within 1/100th of a second of the gold in the 50 m. She also did amazingly in the medley relay that won the US the Silver. She may even be a contender in London--she will only be 45.

Oksana Chusovitina is 33 and still a contender in vault in gymnastics! Incredible, when most of her competition is half her age or less. Addendum: She won the SILVER medal! Go Oksana!

And Constantina Tomescu-Dita won the gold in the Women's Marathon by a huge margin. Her athleticism and experience and high altitude training in Boulder, CO made her a kick butt force and an inspiration to all women runners. Having run several marathons myself, I am in awe of someone who can do such amazing time and look good doing it.

These women show that with great training and refusal to take seriously the expectations of age, they can excel in their passions and competitive spirit.

I am inspired. I am going for a nice long run now.

Sunday Musings

The Beijing Olympic Opening Ceremonies were the coolest, most beautiful, artistic and tasteful I have ever seen. I usually get bored, or start laughing at something garish or tacky or just plain weird. This time, I was wondering what was going to happen next. The torch lighting was sublime. Kudos to the artists who brought that about. Cynically, I could crab about how that money could have gone to better causes, but damn, it was just about worth it...

Bob Costas' mostly commented on the countries coming about how much trouble we are having with each country, and how our relationships with them have suffered. He seemed a bit dour throughout all the fanfare. George W. and his wife were in the stands, looking bored and George was repeatedly whacking a little American flag against his leg in an agitated manner. He should stick to wearing it on his lapel--it will get less wear and tear, and he can pretend he has any respect for it whatsoever. Oh, yes, he is so easy to pick on...but he is on vacation for the next 6 months, so whatever...

--Gymnastics is my favorite event at the summer Olympics. When I was younger, I used to cheer for the USA and only begrudgingly cheer for excellence on any other team. The older I get though, the more I just look at every gymnast and feel like cheering, "Hooray, amazing human bodies! Go, humans! " USA still rocks, but I begrudge no one my amazement.

I have yet to catch Olympic Badminton. I wonder if any of the announcers will start giggling at the word, "shuttlecock." They probably have to get that out of their systems ahead of time...

Even in my dreams, I am losing my idealism.

Last night, I dreamt vividly that I was trying to convince some young, earnest theatre friends of mine that starting an organic farm co-op to fund their theatre company was a terrible business plan and a poor use of time. I was giving them handfuls of disposable diapers as we discussed this.

In a strange way, it makes so much sense...

Weight Loss "Encouragement" at the Ballpark

Last weekend we went to a minor league baseball game. There is some lovely food at a baseball game, and I particularly enjoyed a hot dog with mustard and a real Coke (not diet). There are also so many other good snacks I was sort of tempted.

Then I looked at the people around me. Literally 1/2 of the people were morbidly obese, and 1/3 of the remaining were overweight. This is not an exaggeration. The obese woman next to me bragging to another obese woman in front of me that she had to keep buying snacks for her child because he was bored and it kept him in his seat. The child was not very overweight, yet. She was doing that because she didn't want to have get up and go look for him on the small field beside the outfield where other bored children were playing, because in 4 innings he was supposed to do one of the between-inning contests. The obese woman in front nodded and praised him for being a good eater. I must have dropped my jaw, because the obese woman next to me shot me an annoyed look. I didn't look at them for the rest of the game.

All around me the largest people were chewing chewing chewing like a gigantic herd. The only time they moved was to go get more food or to go to the bathroom.

I lost all temptation to eat beyond my hotdog and coke. The legions of obese people were a wonderful deterent to overeating--living examples of how it all happens. It is so mindless.

Presently I am on a weight loss vigil for myself, since slothful computer habits and a penchant for night time snacking have slowly packed on more pounds than my favorite clothes can handle. I do not want to become another barrel shaped Chicago woman. If I follow the lead of the suburbanite women around me at the ballpark, I will be become a cylindrical, stationary, depressed woman who will develop type 2 diabetes way before my time (it runs in my family, but usually not until getting into the 60s or 70s). This is a conformity I can do without.

I don't have an issue with people hanging on to more weight than is healthy because of genuine health issues, or a lack of resources for wholesome foods or safe exercise venues in their communities. Most of these people did not have those issues. They just weren't thinking. They weren't being mindful that what they were eating was not needed, just wanted. They were actually killing themselves and their children with mindless "good ol' American" overconsumerist greed. From their size, that is how they apparently live their lives.

How much weight could be lost if people were just made mindful of their eating habits? Why is it that one person can look at a group of obese people eating and be made more mindful, where another would take it as a cue to join in the food fest?

I don't have any solutions. Not for the people who are not thinking. Not for the people who are not interested in thinking. But for those who are interested in being more mindful, take a moment before each meal, before each snack, and ask yourself why you are eating and whether it is a need for nourishment, or a want to fill a void. Take a look at the people around you in a social situation--are you following their eating cues, and if so, do you want to look like them? If not, put your money back in your wallet. Your bank account, and eventually, your health care provider will thank you.

Bush and Mukasey and the Forever War on the World

From the ACLU:

This sounds so outrageous, it seems like a joke or something out of "The Onion."

Attorney General Michael Mukasey is demanding that Congress issue a new declaration of war so that anyone that this president or the next one declares to be an "enemy combatant" can be held indefinitely without a trial.

The new declaration of war would make the entire globe — including the United States itself — a “battlefield” where the president decides who will be locked up forever.

With only five weeks left in the Congressional schedule and only six months left in the Bush presidency, Mukasey’s ridiculous power grab should be laughed out of town. But given this Congress’ track record, the Mukasey proposal is no laughing matter. Especially because it also includes a cover-up of the Bush administration’s systemic torture and abuse of detainees.

We can’t take for granted that Congress will reject this outrageous proposal. We have to meet it with an immediate wall of protest that says to Congress: “Don’t you dare.”

P.S. You can read a blog post from Christopher Anders, ACLU Seinor Legislative Counsel, on the Bush/Mukasey plan to subvert the constitution here:
http://action.aclu.org/site/R?i=ops0mQwJic7Q6KhW_RHZ3Q..

I just told my members of Congress to reject the dangerous Bush/Mukasey plan. You can do the same thing here:

http://action.aclu.org/mukasey

"Eyelids" A Cannes Film Short 2008

This is a film short that made it to the Short Film Corner at Cannes this year, made by my talented young friends at www.lookatrubbish.com It stars my son, Alex.

Bush a Total Failure? Worse.

Oh, it is rich. The mainstream US media getting all up at arms about Nancy Pelosi coming right out and calling George W. a "total failure."

Congress also has no record to be proud of, since they are all still dithering with minutiae of political maneuvering of the sort that stalls any real action on anything--like real alternative energy tax credits (worth billions in dollars, employment and megawattage) or, oh...impeachment.

But why is the mainstream media going all " oh no she di'nt!" on her when Bush is acting like a totally smug, entitled arrogant asshole at the G8 conference?

"The American leader, who has been condemned throughout his presidency for failing to tackle climate change, ended a private meeting with the words: "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter."

He then punched the air while grinning widely, as the rest of those present including Gordon Brown and Nicolas Sarkozy looked on in shock."

Nancy Pelosi gets indignant "media uproar" while George W. continues to be a smug, arrogant, entitled asshole to the world's leaders. And you wonder why we have lost respect in record time from the rest of the world...

Soft hearted (headed) for Birds

I observe this has been a birdy month.

Observation #1 Baby ducks can break my heart.

Last week, a momma duck and her last baby were in the Target parking lot, and 2 ladies had been watching over them until animal control could come get the ducks and get them to a nearby pond. The momma duck had already lost two babies. Animal control was one lady with a net, and she didn't want to spook the momma. We tried to corral them, but the momma and baby kept walking back and forth between cars. It was important to get the momma first, because we did not want her to think that her baby was captured and she needed to abandon it. The baby was getting tired and sat down, panting. The momma was tired too. The momma finally started to try to distract the lady with the net by pretending to fly away, and the very, very tired baby peeped frantically, almost screaming, and ran after her, and he was so tired! The momma stayed. It was breaking my heart, and even now I am tearing up for that poor scared baby duck and his momma. I wasn't being much help, just being another giant scary human, and I walked into the store I was going to, and by the time I walked out, animal control was driving away. I wish I knew if the baby duck and his momma were okay. I couldn't find the ladies who had been watching over them. Baby ducks break my heart.

Observation #2 I have become "head" of the flock to a cockatiel

Unrelated to the first observation, I have decided to take in a friend's young cockatiel. I have never had a bird before. This one is very cute. He was on my head as I type this, but now he is on the monitor. He is gosh darn cute. The kids are fighting to have him sit on their heads. It's a win for everyone, especially the cockatiel, which was in danger of getting eaten by a german shepherd puppy. My cat is unimpressed, and goes on with life as usual. The bird's name is Sunny. Say hello, Sunny! ... Not yet, but he may, some day.

The Glory of Pokemon Nationals

The whole family is exhausted and emotionally drained from the weekend wonder of Pokemon Nationals....Yes, there is such a thing, for the Pokemon Card Game, and it is huge.

There was a new attendance record of 950 participants, all with good rankings in his or her state, and in three different age divisions. My kids were participating in the Junior and Senior divisions, and anyone over 16 participates in the Masters division. I am amazed, but the grown ups are the largest division by half.
The kids were majorly excited. The youngest had been the state champ in his division, and had earned a travel stipend to come. The older one has won several other events during the year and also ranked well enough for decent pairings.

Dan got the convention pass when we committed to it in the spring, and spent the whole day with them. I have family in the area and hung out with them. Next year, should we do this again, we will split the duties. It was high emotion time for all the kids there. There were a lot of kids who were used to winning in their leagues and tournaments who did not do well at all with the heightened competition. The main prizes were scholarships for $5000 and $3000 and $1000, so it wasn't just for bragging rights. The winners also get invites and travel and lodging for Pokemon Worlds in Orlando, FL this year.

Dan said that there were some really high pressure parents there, really focusing on that getting to Worlds and win win win. There were a lot of stressed out kids, either getting consoled or given boisterous pep talks.

Our kids were just happy to be there and strategizing for next year. The older was 4-4 and the younger 3-5 in the long long day of prelim rounds that went from 10am to 10pm. I dropped them all off at 7:30am to get in line to make sure they even got in. They had moments after a loss where they were disappointed, but they kept at it and kept a good sportsman attitude. Both felt like it was a good showing for their first time there.

It may take a few days to make it back to normal. Just like with any huge competition, time is needed for decompression and regrouping.

Back from California

We did a delightful romp through the Northern CA area for the past couple of weeks.

Mostly, I totally dug it. Showing the kids the first apartment Dan and I lived in, playing tourist in San Francisco, walking all over the place. We found we had a hard time remembering which road to take where, but a lot of it was where it should be. Some of our favorite restaurants were gone, but replaced with new ones. We saw friends and did all the stuff we used to do with them. The apex of my missing Northern CA was visiting our first house, and finding the neighborhood was just as beautiful and idyllic as I remembered it. We even did a trip up to Tahoe for a family reunion that was about as picturesque as one could want.

However, by the end of the trip, I was ready to go back to the Chicago area and be content. I feel at home here. I guess I will never get used to the dryness of the climate in the Bay Area, or the nasty air that hung over Sacramento so much of the year. Over 800 wildfires broke out over the last weekend we were there, and just driving back to San Jose from Tahoe made my lungs feel seared and my eyes red and irritated. I would hate living in Sacramento and having to breathe that for days on end, or live in parched hills where I would have to worry about fire consuming my neighborhood. Earthquakes, eh, not so bad. Tornadoes are easier for me to deal with though because you can hide from them.

California was wonderful for all the years I lived there--always exciting, always something new, full of possibilities. I learned a lot (much of it the hard way) about how to feel out different cultures and customs and avoid offending. The Bay Area is so packed and so diverse, there may be literally 50 different languages spoken in one neighborhood and no way for anyone to insulate themselves in a "village," so you had to find commonalities and forgive each other's mistakes. It was a great experience.

It was also a mixed blessing that the climate doesn't change there. Nothing can get put off for a rainy day, because that would only be two or three times a year. However, you realize that time seems to pass faster because there are no seasonal cues. I was caught off guard one day trying to remember if it was May or December, that I knew I had to get back to real weather.

The trip was great for reminding me what I lost, but also appreciate what I have gotten back moving back to the midwest.

Kids are Entertaining

"Mom, I have to talk to you," said my youngest, a worried look on his face.
"What is it?' I ask.
"Mom, there are little hairs in my sink."
My husband had shaved in the kids bathroom this morning, since I had already taken over our sink getting ready to go for an audition.
"Those are Daddy's, from shaving."
"Oh!" he said, relieved, "I was afraid we might have tarantulas."