He was obviously imbalanced and in need of help, which his family, much to their horror, was not able to get for him in time.
Feeding his imbalance and heightening his rage were internet sites such as "The Pickup Artist," and other men's dating sites. The purpose of these sites is to make getting a "girl"or a "bitch" to have sex with seem like a nearly impossible, failure-ridden game that insecure, imbalanced men need to spend money on CDs and DVDs to finally have a hope of bagging a babe.
These sites strip it down to women being these horrible creatures that are constantly "judging" your worthiness as an alpha male and ready to reject you as fuckworthy with esoteric and unknowable reasons, that you can ONLY figure out with their patented "Game Plan."
I have a close relative (somewhere on the asperger's scale and very gullible) who falls for this sort of angle, and it has caused him no end of anxiety and fear-filled anger towards all women, including myself. Here is an excerpt of one of the newsletters that he forwarded to me, that he honestly felt might be the way to finally get a woman to date him because it came from "a community of experts:"
From doubleyourdating.com
-
Why Women TEST You -- How to Respond
MPORTANT: If you find yourself "failing" the tests that women throw at you, then the problem is probably worse than you think. If you've found yourself getting upset when a woman flakes out on you... or not knowing what to do when a woman challenges you... then you should take a few minutes and look at THIS right now:
- HOW DO WOMEN TEST MEN?
For most guys, the concept of a woman "testing"
them seems a little strange.
Why would a woman WANT to test a man?
What could she possibly gain from it?
The answer: A LOT.
By testing a man, a woman can learn THE MOST
IMPORTANT thing about him...
And I'll share what that is a little bit later
-
! on in this newsletter.
TEST: A DEFINITION
So I was thinking about this particular topic
today, and I realized that I've never looked up the definition of the word "test."
When I did, here's what I found:
1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial; a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance.
"WHY WOMEN TEST MEN, AND WHAT TO DO WHEN IT
HAPPENS TO YOU..."
Women test men.
That's the reality of the situation.
Women test men RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING, and
they keep on testing FOREVER.
If you don't know how to deal with the tests
that women throw at you, you have VERY LITTLE
Women test men.
That's the reality of the situation.
Women test men RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING, and
they keep on testing FOREVER.
If you don't know how to deal with the tests
that women throw at you, you have VERY LITTLE
2. A series of questions, problems, or physical
responses designed to determine knowledge,
intelligence, or ability.
3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson).
OK, so take a moment and read those again.
The purpose of a test is to figure something out. It's a way of getting "true" information about something.
So back to my earlier question... Why do women test men in the first place?
BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO.
If you walk up to a man and say "Hey, how much money do you make?" he can LIE.
If you ask him if he is good in bed, he can LIE.
If you ask him if he's strong enough to deal with the challenges of life, support a family, and reach his goals, he can LIE.
Are you with me here?
In other words, if you get to the end of one of your college courses, the teacher COULD just ask you if you have a comprehensive understanding of the material you learned during the course.
But you could LIE.
So the teacher gives you a TEST to see if you REALLY know what's going on.
Well, in the same way that teachers test students, women test MEN.
And that means YOU, Sparky.
But there's one LITTLE TEENSY WEENSY difference between the kinds of tests that women give you and
the kinds of tests that teachers give you...
Women don't tell you first... that they're going to test you!
And they don't teach you what you need to know BEFORE they test you.
They just do it.
Right when they meet you.
Within the first few seconds, actually.
Why?
Because women don't have the TIME to deal with
all the guys who are interested in them.
And they're not interested in getting together
with a man who doesn't "get it" in the first
3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson).
OK, so take a moment and read those again.
The purpose of a test is to figure something out. It's a way of getting "true" information about something.
So back to my earlier question... Why do women test men in the first place?
BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO.
If you walk up to a man and say "Hey, how much money do you make?" he can LIE.
If you ask him if he is good in bed, he can LIE.
If you ask him if he's strong enough to deal with the challenges of life, support a family, and reach his goals, he can LIE.
Are you with me here?
In other words, if you get to the end of one of your college courses, the teacher COULD just ask you if you have a comprehensive understanding of the material you learned during the course.
But you could LIE.
So the teacher gives you a TEST to see if you REALLY know what's going on.
Well, in the same way that teachers test students, women test MEN.
And that means YOU, Sparky.
But there's one LITTLE TEENSY WEENSY difference between the kinds of tests that women give you and
the kinds of tests that teachers give you...
Women don't tell you first... that they're going to test you!
And they don't teach you what you need to know BEFORE they test you.
They just do it.
Right when they meet you.
Within the first few seconds, actually.
Why?
Because women don't have the TIME to deal with
all the guys who are interested in them.
And they're not interested in getting together
with a man who doesn't "get it" in the first
place.
Beautiful women aren't looking for a guy to
TRAIN.
And the tests don't stop... by the way. If you meet an attractive, interesting,
emotionally healthy woman, you can expect to be tested until either:
1) The relationship ends.
! 2) You or she DIES.
And it goes on. And on. Holy hell, it's awful.
Beautiful women aren't looking for a guy to
TRAIN.
And the tests don't stop... by the way. If you meet an attractive, interesting,
emotionally healthy woman, you can expect to be tested until either:
1) The relationship ends.
! 2) You or she DIES.
And it goes on. And on. Holy hell, it's awful.
The writer does
an excellent job at finding their audience--the guy who lacks confidence or fears rejection--
and preys on his anxiety and fears. The picture they paint would create in anybody a good bit of
anger towards women, and create a wish to beat them into submission. Hell, I felt emasculated and angry just reading it, and I'm a woman! What were these unknowable creatures that constantly are judging and rejecting?
Why, one must buy a CD or DVD that explains these horrible monsters and how to beat them, (literally maybe) at their "game!"
At these sites, women are not human. Women are objects, monsters, monoliths of endless Judgement and Scorn. They in no way approach reality of anything to do with actual women. These sites prey upon male insecurities, magnify supposed failures of "beta" men to please these impossible pretend women-monsters. They encourage misogyny with the goal of taking money from the gullible and as an added bonus, justify and celebrate rape culture with their "success" stories.
The rampage this weekend is tragic, but not an isolated outburst from someone who has taken this sort of "training" and heightened his rage instead of "making progress." Most of the acting out of their rage is on individuals, and it happens every day. Follow Twitter #yesallwomen and see thousands of stories of women who deal with misogyny every day, and you will see a number of stories pertaining to men who take the "advice" of these sites seriously, with disastrous results.
Personally, I saw it with my relative. The more he read these sites, the stranger his correspondence with me was--progressively angrier, always expecting and projecting horrible judgement that I must be heaping on him at every opportunity for things I was not aware of, since I live several states away. It was crazy. Finally, when I was home for Christmas, he physically became violent with me when I warned him not to take colloidal silver internally, since it was only for topical use. Not exactly fighting words, right?
After this, I had to cut off all contact with him. This is a close relative, so it was painful to deal with. Eventually I let him be a Facebook friend, with limited access to my page, but that was it. Now we don't even have that, since he shut down his account due to someone taking money through his Facebook or something? I haven't questioned it too closely. Shortly after he closed his account, emailed me an article about something, I made the mistake of commenting on it, he took offense, feeling once again that I was condemning him instead of just expressing an opinion, and I realized that he is still living in a world of fear, anger, and anxiety and is looking for someone to blame.
I have no idea if he is still reading these pick-up artist sites, but if he is, he will go off again on someone. It won't likely be gun and knife rampage, it may not even be other-directed, but I fear he will go off.
My father feels this too, to some extent. Since this relative has moved back to his area, he has not wanted me to visit. I have been essentially exiled from the family home because he is afraid of another violent outburst.
Preying on the vulnerable is a crime, and it has consequences for men and women, individuals and families. PUA sites should not escape culpability for this and other crimes that they perpetuate. They are truly evil entities.
Why, one must buy a CD or DVD that explains these horrible monsters and how to beat them, (literally maybe) at their "game!"
At these sites, women are not human. Women are objects, monsters, monoliths of endless Judgement and Scorn. They in no way approach reality of anything to do with actual women. These sites prey upon male insecurities, magnify supposed failures of "beta" men to please these impossible pretend women-monsters. They encourage misogyny with the goal of taking money from the gullible and as an added bonus, justify and celebrate rape culture with their "success" stories.
The rampage this weekend is tragic, but not an isolated outburst from someone who has taken this sort of "training" and heightened his rage instead of "making progress." Most of the acting out of their rage is on individuals, and it happens every day. Follow Twitter #yesallwomen and see thousands of stories of women who deal with misogyny every day, and you will see a number of stories pertaining to men who take the "advice" of these sites seriously, with disastrous results.
Personally, I saw it with my relative. The more he read these sites, the stranger his correspondence with me was--progressively angrier, always expecting and projecting horrible judgement that I must be heaping on him at every opportunity for things I was not aware of, since I live several states away. It was crazy. Finally, when I was home for Christmas, he physically became violent with me when I warned him not to take colloidal silver internally, since it was only for topical use. Not exactly fighting words, right?
After this, I had to cut off all contact with him. This is a close relative, so it was painful to deal with. Eventually I let him be a Facebook friend, with limited access to my page, but that was it. Now we don't even have that, since he shut down his account due to someone taking money through his Facebook or something? I haven't questioned it too closely. Shortly after he closed his account, emailed me an article about something, I made the mistake of commenting on it, he took offense, feeling once again that I was condemning him instead of just expressing an opinion, and I realized that he is still living in a world of fear, anger, and anxiety and is looking for someone to blame.
I have no idea if he is still reading these pick-up artist sites, but if he is, he will go off again on someone. It won't likely be gun and knife rampage, it may not even be other-directed, but I fear he will go off.
My father feels this too, to some extent. Since this relative has moved back to his area, he has not wanted me to visit. I have been essentially exiled from the family home because he is afraid of another violent outburst.
Preying on the vulnerable is a crime, and it has consequences for men and women, individuals and families. PUA sites should not escape culpability for this and other crimes that they perpetuate. They are truly evil entities.
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